IS BEING A LATE BLOOMER A PROBLEM?

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Question: I have a question: when does being a “late bloomer” become a problem? I have never had a serious relationship. I am waiting until I graduate from college because the guys here are the minority as my school is 70 percent female and most guys just want to hook up.

In this video Ayida Honor and Lenon Honor discuss some of the challenges that late bloomers have in relationships. Late bloomers are people who do not engage in relationships or sexual activity until much later than what is normally expected. We have advised for people to take their time in relationships and to take their time before committing to sexual activity. This can be a challenge for many people because we live in a society that expects for young people to be in relationships and to engage in sexual activity. Much of the media programming promotes sexual promiscouity. Therefore, there is a lot of pressure for relationship activity even if it is not something that is beneficial to a person. The same thing applies to sexual interactions. There are many people who engage in sexual activity even if it is not in their best interest. This is why we encourage people to take their time.

Recently I posted on facebook page a message that got a lot of attention. I posted that after 16 years I am more attracted to my wife than I was when we first met. My wife and I decided to do a video discussion to talk about what people can do to keep the attraction alive in their relationship. Some of the things that my wife and I do to keep the attraction include:

1. Humor and laughter. I do my best to make my wife laugh as much as possible. This keeps our relationship enjoyable and the enjoy-ability translates into attraction.

2. Communication about what is attractive to you and what is attractive to your partner.

3. Staying in shape. Many people let their physical health go once they are in a relationship. It is important for a man and a woman to take care of their physical condition not just for themselves but also for their partner.

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6 Comments

  • Aeri A
    Reply

    thanks for answering my question. i am working on making new friends and finding mew hobbies. i don’t want to pick a man out of desperation. my education and improving myself through meditation amd exercise is my focus. i want to make sure i have high self esteem and mental preparedness before seeking out a romantic partner. thank you again! i will rewatch the video to help me.

  • Nikki Johnson
    Reply

    Yep I just did that this year, rushed because I scared of having the stigma of being a late bloomer and that relationship taught me I’m not ready still! So I now am trying to accept myself for my slowwww glow up. 😆 ah Mrs. honor the social thing…I recommend developing friendships too. I will do that for myself also.

  • Akosua Boateng
    Reply

    Thanks for the wonderful advice. You guys being one of the only nontoxic couples I’ve seen has really encouraged me to be careful about the people I choose to be around.I probably learned more about positive relationships in this last year watching you guys than I have in my 17 years of life. Keep up the good wisdom!

  • Shango Warrior
    Reply

    Hi Lenon
    thank you for this video.
    i am à 25 years Old man And ive never been in a relations hip With a woman until récent ly. but the thing is i had many friendships With women since i was 12. i had mâle friends like everyone And also plenty of female friends. sometimes i was very much anxious about whether i would get in a relationship With a woman one day… but now That i just recently met a woman in my life I can clear ly see what i like And what i dont like in this relationship be cause of my past friendships With women.still it is not That easy because à friendship is not the same as an intimate relationship but I can tell That it was worth the wait because today i am proud to be With this Wonderful woman i met 1 year ago.

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